The rarest type

My name is Cal. And I am addicted to personality typing.

For the last several years, as I've gotten super serious about figuring myself out, I've gone through periods where I'll do a lot of reading about Myers-Briggs types. It probably started with the purchase of the book, "Do What You Are."

I'm a bit ambivalent about the Myers Briggs. On the one hand, it is widely used by career counselors, employers, and many psychologists. On the other hand, it is not without controversy. Some people question its validity, which is only natural since humanity is certainly too complex to be neatly sorted into 16 discrete categories.

And yet, I always find reading about it fascinating. Perhaps it's my version of astrology.

In any case, the rest of this entry will be written assuming there is at least some validity to the Myers-Briggs.

I usually test as an INFJ, the most rare of types. Most sources I find estimate that only 1% of people are an INFJ. No wonder I feel so out of place a lot of the time!

For those unfamiliar, here's the break down of what those letters mean:

I: I'm an introvert, as opposed to an extrovert (E). This does not necessarily mean the same thing as shy. Shy is socially anxious. Introverted just means I gain more energy and spend more time in the "inner world" than in the "outer world." INFJ's are actually often mistaken for introverts, and I can say the same thing about myself. One of the greatest compliments I ever received was when an undergrad in the lab I used to work in denied that I was an introvert. Truth is, I love people and communicating. I just don't necessarily find it easy or effortless, and I often need to recharge alone after a lot of it.

N: I'm intuitive (as opposed to sensing), meaning I pay a lot more attention to thoughts, ideas, and implications than I do to the physical world around me. This makes a lot of sense to me. I admit it, I'm not "with it" when it comes to the concerns of the outside world. My room is usually a mess. I hate daily tasks like cooking and cleaning (unless they can be made into a social activity). I'm not particularly materialistic. I like intellectual conversations and am good at grasping concepts.

F: This one's a close one. I'm a Feeler rather than a Thinker. It's about how I make decisions. Clearly (if you've read this blog) I am a very cerebral, logical person. But when it comes to making decisions, my values and emotions often win out. Hence why I turned down a grad school offer when it didn't feel right to me.

J: I'm stronger in "Judging" than "Perceiving." This is the least intuitive category, but basically it means I prefer closure, stability and order to ambiguity, spontaneity and disorder. I might be near the middle since I'm definitely not Type A and do consider myself quite laid back, but over all I do get stressed out with ambiguity (my blogs wouldn't exist other wise, haha).

INFJs are often drawn to two main types of careers . . . "helping" careers (teaching, counseling, health care, etc.) and "artistic" careers (writing, music, acting, etc.) That's pretty spot on since I work in something health care related and have artistic hobbies!

In relationships, INFJs are focused on deep, meaningful relationships and usually have little interest in one night stands (bingo).

As for what types they tend to be attracted to romantically . . . one of the top ones is ENFP. Which makes a lot of sense to me! I find people who are more extroverted than me to be attractive typically, and I also like people who are more laid back and spontaneous than me. However, I like to feel an intellectual connection and also like to share common values.

Thinking of the guys that I tend to be most attracted to, in retrospect they often seem to fit ENFP. Whether they actually are or whether that's just the way they present themselves is another question. I'm pretty sure that a certain former flame was guilty of hiding behind a facade.

Now, whether I should actually use personality typology to target possible matches is questionable. It is quite common for people to state their Myers-Briggs type in a dating profile. Just like anything else, it's just a fun thing to consider.

Your turn, what is your Myers-Briggs type?