Wednesday, November 19, 2014

So far so good

Hello all,

A quick update before the holidays. I will be taking the whole week off of work to drive up to Northern California to visit family, as well as YouTube Guy and his boyfriend.

Things are still progressing with Dean. It's been about a month and a half since we first met. I've accompanied him to a couple parties and have met several of his friends and coworkers. They all seem to like me. He has also come and hung out with me and my troupe friends a couple of times. One friend was slightly bummed that I brought him to a sketch show she performed in . . . she wanted to set me up with her friend in the group. I can't help but wonder whether that was a case of "Oh, I know a guy who'd be perfect for you!" "Oh really, how come?" "Well, he's gay, you're gay . . ."

Dean is a really great guy. Really friendly, fun, outgoing, and considerate. Part of me is just waiting for him to end things, haha. I'm doing all I can to get rid of my cynicism and allow for the possibility that maybe, just maybe this one might actually like me.

I still suffer from obsessive rumination about my past relationship, especially as Thanksgiving approaches and I am reminded of the time that my ex accompanied me across the country to my parents' house. I bounce between trying to cast my thoughts in a healthier light and just trying to suppress them entirely. I worry that I will never again be so enthusiastic about a new relationship, but I also wonder whether that isn't actually a good thing. Sure, I'm not head over heels for this new guy, but that would allow me to enter into a relationship with both eyes open. Any feelings would develop slowly out of getting to know one another and sharing experiences, and wouldn't be based on some stupid infatuation. I don't know. Just going with the flow.

The big upcoming event at Thanksgiving? My cousin Roger is going to come out to his conservative parents. And I'll be there. Should be interesting.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

A promising guy

I had one of my blog readers comment to me that things must be going well, since I haven't updated lately. I guess you could say that, haha.

I did fully intend to write more often, regardless of my mood. I've just had other things on my mind lately, I guess. Maybe I'll answer more of those thought questions soon.

In any case, things are indeed going pretty well.

I'm still seeing Disney Guy, and he probably deserves a proper pseudonym. Let's call him Dean.

Since I met him at Disney Gay Days, we've hung out three times. Every weekend except one.

The first weekend, we spent a lot of time together. We had dinner at a nice restaurant, went to a dance club, saw a play, and lounged around. It just kind of happened that way since we had both come up with ideas for our first proper date.

The second weekend he came down to my neck of the woods and watched my improv show. Then we had brunch the next morning and I drove him up to one of my favorite viewpoints. Perhaps some other stuff happened in between there . . .

The third weekend we were too busy to hang out, but we did talk on the phone.

This past weekend I drove up to go to a Halloween party with Dean and his friends. Had a great time. I spent the night and we had breakfast the next morning before I needed to leave for a family gathering.

I'm liking him so far. He seems like he has a good head on his shoulders. I'm not getting troubling mixed messages. We usually check in via text about once a day or so. We click well personality wise. He's got a good, fascinating career in entertainment that he's been doing for quite some time, which speaks to his level of maturity and stability.

I'm definitely taking it slow. I'm just focused on getting to know him for now, especially since this is another guy that I can only see on weekends due to distance. I won't be able to see him this weekend because of more family activities (my mom is in town), but I'll probably visit him the week after. I'm still chatting with a couple other guys from OkCupid and Tinder that I have been corresponding with, but I'm not really messaging anyone new.

Dean identifies as a "top," which would be new for me if we were to enter into a relationship. I told him I lack experience in that realm but think I'd prefer a fairly versatile dynamic. He said in a relationship he'd be open to that. I'm not too worried about that kind of thing for now. I'm just focused on enjoying getting to know him. I'm just happy that I feel the potential for feelings for someone who, at least on the surface, seems to be emotionally healthy.