Question 3
A very good question. I think a lot of us take a while to fully understand ourselves and what makes us happy. We do things we don't like out of a sense of obligation, and because of the influence of others. Only as we mature do we realize that what is right for our loved ones isn't always right for us.
As for the second part of the question, there are many reasons why we like things that we don't do. Sometimes we might be embarrassed or ashamed about enjoying our true interests. Or we don't pursue those things because of low self efficacy or self esteem.
I think over the last couple years I have grown leaps and bounds in this respect. I am increasingly able to accept myself for who I am, and enjoy things I like unapologetically. I was not always like that, that's for sure. Back in middle school and high school I was very paranoid about being thought of as a "nerd," so I purposefully turned my back on certain "nerdy" interests like Star Wars, and resisted associating too much with certain people that might have become good friends had I given them the chance.
The same thing applies to dating. It took a long time to come to terms with my interest in dating guys, but a couple years ago I finally took the plunge. And improv comedy, which has become such a major hobby of mine, only came about because I allowed myself to explore my natural interests without letting my own head get in the way.
I definitely think a major key to being at peace with myself is to allow Cal to be Cal. I think I'm on the right track.
Life is a journey, not a destination. But you still need to know what you want your journey to include in order to declare it a success. We make a lot of choices in this journey, some good, some bad. As long as you satisfy yourself that the paths you have taken (as well as the ones you forgo), count your blessings on what you have. You have a good education, a career, you have your talents, you have your health -- anyone else suffering without these would envy you.
ReplyDeleteIt definitely sounds like you've made a TON of progress! Life is a process in flux, and only by changing and evolving can it grow. There's an ebb and flow to life, I think, where I've been able to forge ahead in certain aspects of my life at the expense of other areas. Continue to move forward and see where your journey takes you. :-)
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